Today I spent daddy son time with my youngest son. So, I decided to take him to a local restaurant. I love to frequent this place. Today was different. As I walked it, it was terrible busy - no big deal. As we walked in there was one place to sit. It wasn't the best spot in the house, but we took it anyway.
After sitting there for about 5-8 minutes I started to notice something. In the midst of the busyness of the morning, my son and I had not been a priority in the eyes of the server - so i felt. Have you ever felt like that in your marriage, job, or community? You've been in a marriage for 25 years, and all your husband does is work, and the only time you see him is when you both are dead tired and ready to call it a day.
The loneliest person on earth is the person who feels like no one cares. I know I know. I may be dragging it out. But, today I learned a lesson. Caring for others matters. It's through the embrace of a caring person that others feel the weight of our God given capacity to love.
At some point my server finally made it to my table. No eye contact, not tlc, and no greeting. "What would you like to drink." Not a bad question, but how about good morning. We ordered drinks. After 10 more minutes we ordered. After twenty minutes food - that was cold. I'm not that hard to please, but It was apparent that we were not a priority. So, here's what I learned and three ways you can care.
Be Present In The Present
It's terribly hard to be all the way present with others. The next time you're at home, work, in a college class. Make eye contact. Listen with your heart. Take the posture of understanding. In the sacredness of the moment the one you're being present with will appreciate your honor. Had my server simply been present it would have changed the total of her tip (I always tip at least 20%.)
The more interested we are in others the more they feel and sense that you care. The moment we sat down at our table I could sense from our server that we were just a task waiting to be checked off. Paying attention to how we come off when we're with others will go a long way.
After being at this restaraunt for about an hour or so, we only saw our server once. My water went low, coffee was out, I had to get my own silverware and straw. Needless to say her time serving us was not a priority. We all have to work at this one. None of us are exempt from the temptation of not using our time in a way that lets others know that we care. Using our time to spend with others can go a long way in showing others that we care.
Thankfully, this experience that I had today is not the norm. Will I return - of course. I'm going there tomorrow. But, I'll never forget the day I wasn't cared for.
What have you learned about caring for others?